February 13th, 2006

Jane has a habit of doodling notes on papers and then leaving them adrift throughout the house. The other night I came across a 3x5 card with my name spelled out some dozen times, some doodling, some guy's name, and the date February 13, 2006.

Simon: "Hey, Jane, what's the 13th of February 2006?"

Jane: "The day before Valentine's Day."

Simon: "Right. Why'd you write it on this card."

Jane: "No reason."

A beat. Jane starts to laugh. The laugh gets pretty deep.

Jane: "I remember now."

Simon: "Okay. Are you going to share with me?"

Jane, reaching for her daily BC pill: "It's the day your next child is born."

Simon: "You're pregnant?"

Jane: "I don't know."

Simon: "If you're pregnant you shouldn't be taking those pills... And just when were you going to tell me."

Jane: "Well, I'll know for sure in four days."

So, if Jane thinks she might be pregnant, I guess we have been having at least some sex.

And then, last night, as I'm drifting off to sleep, Jane says, "I think we should start seeing other people."

"What!?" I think. "Where the hell did that come from?"

So, I say to her, "I think that's the stupidist idea I've ever heard." And then I face off to sleep.

Today at work, the grinding of the factory floor making my desk shake, I think to myself that beyond that being the stupidist idea I've ever heard, she'd never actually allow it, Little Ms. Double Standards and I don't even want you looking at another woman.

Meanwhile, I'm here... waiting for the day before Valentine's Day.