Nurses. Nurses. Nurses. Naughty nurses everywhere.

You may remember back in November 2005, I had this thing going for nurses... and an idea for a strip club called The Emergency Room. Truth be told, I haven't gotten over the naughty nurse thing...

Today, I discovered that some entrepreneur has already done what I wanted to do... well, not quite, as it's not a strip club, but a little something a bit more mainstream. It's called the Heart Attack Grill. Notes their website:

The newspapers say, "Throw In-N-Out and Hooters in a blender, add a splash of television show Nip/Tuck and you have the Heart Attack Grill." Well that's close but it's certainly not the whole story. To be accurate you'd have to include the basic principles of Honesty and Simplicity. We apply these principles in the way that we treat two very important groups of people:

Customers

Ours is a world in which insane political correctness stands as a barrier between the average man and his pursuit of happiness, the Heart Attack Grill offers a well-deserved respite of comfort and simplicity. Pondering "Single, Double, or Triple" and "go with a Bud or go with a Heineken" are the toughest mental gymnastics that anyone should have to perform.

Just relax and eat. KEEP IT SIMPLE! Oh yeah, and how about being able to get your burger from a pretty girl with a smile on her face WHO SPEAKS ENGLISH?! The simple pleasures of a bygone era are still alive and well at the Heart Attack Grill.

Employees

Our employees receive the highest base pay in the industry and we have insurance programs available for both full and part-time employees. Rather than paying the lowest possible wages that we can get away with, we pay them the highest possible wages that we can get away with. Our Nurses* work hard and deserve to be rewarded by sharing in our success.

The element of sex appeal is prevalent at the grill, and we believe that our Nurses* are as socially acceptable as the all-American cheerleader. Our "famous" Nurses* are an important part of the Heart Attack Grill experience. We hire women who best fit the classic image of a loving and understanding confidant. Claims (by PC Nazis) that we exploit beautiful women are as ridiculous as saying the NBA exploits men who are tall and athletic. Our Nurses* have the equal right to use their female sex appeal and natural charm to earn a living as do actresses and super models. We applaud the women's rights movement because it guarantees that women have the right to choose their own careers. It should be known that women occupy the majority of management positions at the Heart Attack Grill.

One of the funniest things about the Grill is that some professional nurses believe that people will think the nurses at the Grill are real, medical nurses! They've been threatened with a lawsuit by the Arizona State Board of Nursing! To counter, they have a whole page dedicated to explaining that the Grill's nurses are only pretend.

I hate to think what they'd say about The Emergency Room strip club...

In the mean time, enjoy the nurses...

Oh, I miss the Eighties...

I was stumbling around the Internet and I came across this old Duran Duran video; made me wish I was twenty years younger...

All's well here in the Winky household. Although, I have to say, there's been no sex... Well, once since the little one arrived: a moment of coupling... that I swear was going to produce son number five... ;-)

Enjoy the video!

My absence... and the baby is here...

Well, gentle readers, yes, I've been off-line for quite a while. And, yes, the bambino has arrived... three weeks ago, now... Jane and baby are doing fine. We'll call the baby, here, Mason. He's cute, but unlike my other three sons, he came with a full head of hair. He looks nothing like me. I've been saying that the father is one of our neighbors; Jane says I'm way wrong.

Well, we are pretty certain he was conceived at an NCL party, although it was one when Jane didn't play, so I guess Mason is mine... even if he doesn't look at all like me.

Anyway, we're all well... except for Miller. At two-and-a-half, he's decided having a younger brother is not his cup of tea. He hates him. Miller will not even look at him. He'd toss Mason down the stairs, given the chance. The little monster.

Not much up on the sex front. My little yellow pills have really driven down my sex drive, and Jane's been on "pelvic rest" per orders from the doctor. That'll be over soon, and hopefully I can find something to bring my libido to the bedroom.

NCL is having their November social tonight; we're missing it. Too bad, too, because Nurse Betty wrote me and asked if I'd meet up with her. Her husband is out of town, and she is going to the party with his sub and wanted to play with me.

Not that I'd actually be able to get it up, but... The last time Jane and I went to NCL, I had some performance problems. Not sure if it was anti-depressants or the voyeurs... Turns out I'm not much for putting on shows.

Well, that's it for now... More to follow, and hopefully I'll get back in the swing of posting here at the Sausage Factory.

Oh, and by-the-by, I recommend using a reader, such as Bloglines, for your reading pleasure. I recently set up a Bloglines account and it's made it easier to read all sorts of stuff from the web, although it is becoming overwhelming.